- This isn’t the first time you almost killed someone and the rest of us have had
to clean it up.
- Are you kidding me?
Doctor visit
Doctor: Are you sexually active?
Me: Yes.
Doctor: Is there any chance you could be pregnant?
Me: No.
Doctor: Are you taking birth control pills?
Me: No.
Doctor: Do you use condoms?
Me: Nope.
Doctor (beginning to look concerned): Is there a medical reason you can't become pregnant?
Me: Not that I'm aware of.
Doctor (looking even more concerned, now speaking in a condescending tone): Then how do you know there's no chance of pregnancy?
Me: Last I checked, my female partner would have a hard time pulling that off.
Melissa: I know this is gonna sound dumb, but I feel bad for Faye. We were kind of harsh.
Diana: Melissa… You could have died tonight because of her.
Melissa: I know. But…Look, she’s a little wrapped up in herself. Everyone knows that. It’s just…
Diana: She’s your friend.
Melissa: She is. She just has her own way of showing it. Must sound pretty pathetic to you.
Diana: Not at all.
